A Bittersweet Journey: Michigan and Memories of Sana

A Bittersweet Journey: Michigan and Memories of Sana As we make our way back to Chicago with hearts that feel both heavy and grateful, I find myself reflecting on our recent trip to Michigan. It was a bittersweet experience, wrapped in the comforting warmth of friendships yet shadowed by the ache of memories from two years ago when we made this same trip with Sana. The drive up to Michigan was quiet, a time for reflection as the familiar sights brought back flashes of moments spent with her. Two years ago, the house was alive with her laughter and energy. I could still hear her voice echoing in my mind, her distinct laughter filling the air as she and Serena worked excitedly on crafting glue guns for everyone—a small but endearing task that had us all amused and brought so much joy to the trip. This time, the house felt different. The spaces that had once been animated by her presence now seemed quieter, yet her memory was everywhere. There was a bittersweet comfort in revisiting those spaces, as if we were embracing the tangible remnants of her spirit. Being with our friends—who are more like family—helped ease some of the pain. They welcomed us with open arms, providing the kind of love and support that only close bonds can offer. It was a reminder that even in grief, there are people who anchor us, who help us carry the weight of our loss. One of the highlights of the trip was meeting Sana’s friends in Michigan. Although it was a brief visit, the joy it brought me was immeasurable. These are friends with whom we’ve shared countless beautiful moments during our time in Singapore—people who knew Sana, loved her, and continue to carry her memory in their hearts. It was heartening to see how much she still means to them, and to hear their stories and recollections of her warmth, kindness, and vibrant personality. Yet, as I think about what lies ahead, anxiety settles in my chest. Our upcoming trips to Italy and India feel daunting. Traveling, which once filled me with excitement, now feels heavy with the weight of memories and the unavoidable reminders of her absence. It’s as though my heart has become a fragile teacup—glued back together after shattering, but with cracks that are still visible and will always remain. But even with these cracks, my heart holds her. Sana is forever etched into the very fabric of my being. Her voice, her laughter, her love—they are not gone; they live on within me, within our family, and within the people whose lives she touched. As we drove back, I looked out at the vast landscapes, feeling both the loss and the beauty of the world around me. This trip to Michigan was a reminder of how life continues, even when it feels like a part of us has stopped. It was also a reminder of the power of connection—of friends, of family, and of memories—to help us navigate this journey of grief. Sana’s absence is a void we will carry forever, but her presence in our hearts will always be a guiding light.