15 months

Fifteen Months Today marks 15 months. For the world, that might feel like a long time ago, a moment in the past that life has moved on from. But for our family, 15 months hasn't lessened the pain; it has deepened it. It's like living with a chronic ailment—the ache is a constant companion. And yet, life continues to change around us. I have a new job, Maahir and Serena are planning their wedding, and Idris is settling into his new life in Chicago. Is that what moving on means? Does it happen even when you're not ready for it? Amidst these changes, there’s a constant, concerted effort to keep Sana’s memory alive. Her photo book is being created, and the Singapore American School is planning a tribute to her on her birthday. Her friend, Mishti, is also organizing a fundraiser in her honor. With these projects in motion, Sana is a constant presence in our lives, in every moment of every day. I feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude toward everyone who is helping to make this possible. The question of "how and why" this happened is one that never leaves us. It’s a silent, constant query in our minds. On my first day of class, I shared photos of my family, including one with Sana. Students asked, "Is that your daughter? She's so pretty." I couldn't bring myself to say she's no longer with us. In that moment, it was easier to let her live on in their eyes, just for a second longer.