Letting the heart heal: Pressure to return to work

Every morning, I start my day by applying for jobs. It's a routine that usually helps me cope by keeping me busy and distracted. But this time, I'm not sure if it will work. My body and heart simply aren't ready. There's a pressure to go back to work, fueled by the guilt that neither of us has a job right now. Is that really what we should be worried about? Grief is a powerful and all-consuming force. It alters your sense of time, your priorities, and your ability to function. When you're in the depths of it, even the simplest tasks can feel insurmountable. The societal expectation to quickly return to the rigmarole of life’s routines can add an extra layer of stress and guilt. But should returning to work be our main concern when our hearts are still raw from loss? I've always believed in the importance of staying busy during tough times. It's a coping strategy that has worked for me in the past, allowing me to focus on tasks and temporarily set aside my pain. However, this time feels different. The grief is deeper, the wound fresher. The thought of jumping back into the daily grind feels overwhelming and almost impossible. In moments like these, it’s crucial to listen to your heart and body. They need time to heal. Forcing yourself into a routine before you're ready can do more harm than good. It’s important to give yourself the grace to grieve fully, without the added pressure of meeting external expectations. My advice to anyone in a similar situation is to let your heart heal before you jump back into the busyness of life. Grieving is not a linear process, and everyone’s journey is different. Allow yourself the time and space to process your emotions. It’s okay to take a step back and prioritize your mental and emotional well-being. Focusing on healing doesn't mean you're giving up or not moving forward. It means you're taking the necessary steps to truly recover and build a stronger foundation for the future. It's about acknowledging your pain, sitting with it, and giving yourself the compassion you deserve. Returning to work and the routine of daily life will come in due time, but it should not come at the expense of your emotional health. There is no shame in taking a break, in seeking support, or in doing whatever it takes to mend your broken heart. Life will continue to demand our attention, but for now, let us be kind to ourselves. Let us honor our grief and give it the space it needs. Only then can we hope to move forward with genuine strength and resilience.